I feel like such a multi tasker. I’m doing spring cleaning, which means more than I would like right now (and probably much less than needs to be done. But I’m not into spotless houses). I’m working on my May calendar. I’m working on dance business stuffs. I’m trying to downsize a promo deal so I don’t have to pay as much next month, for a bill. I’m mentally compiling grocery needs and bill due dates and all that fun. I’m working on a book for the middle schoolers, and trying to get that done before graduation.
That’s what I tend to do when I get off work, if it’s not a dance teaching evening. Those evenings I really don’t have much energy left over.
Do you know what else I’m trying to do? Steal your heart. Is it working? Sometimes I worry it’s not, but you can’t run on feelings all the time. Sometimes you just have to trust.
Then there’s always the social nonsense. This has been so complicated and hard, but we’re making it work. I’m doing the best I know how. You have to admit it’s been very challenging. I really hate social stuff. It’s like guiding a boat through a storm.
You stayed through my winter, and now the better season for me is ahead. It’s spring. Summer is coming. I started falling for you this past summer. Well, when I wasn’t busy being confused (you know). It was fall when you really caught my eye, but I needed to be pleasing to God.
I’m trying to steal your heart. But I like it when (I think) we can still be annoyed with each other and be okay. I’m annoyed with you, because I keep thinking you’ve moved on completely. And you’re annoyed with me (perhaps?) for not creating as much space with my guy friends as I should. The distance is hard though; when you’re distant. That’s probably one of the most difficult things for me to walk through. It’s probably the same way when I’m that way too. Serious trust issues, for both of us. I’m trying to not spark bad memories, even though I don’t even know what half of them were. We didn’t exactly spend time in the same social group, so I don’t know much about it. I want so badly for you to know I’m different. Can you see that?
Walking over broken roads is hard, but worth it. I want your heart.