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We seem to live in a culture (both Christian, and secular) where the definition of a date, dating, and what to look for in a guy is a matter of half a million opinions. Thus, no one is really able to start out on the same ground, so we’re all left confused and frustrated and often burned.

Here’s some of my thoughts on guys and dating. Perhaps they’ll help you readers in deciding how to establish common ground in this trackless territory.

What I look for in a guy –

  • Is a strong Christian
  • Has the same basic worldview as me
  • Meets some of the basic things on my list
  • Is not possessive, not controlling
  • Gives me the freedom to be me and is not trying to change me
  • Lets me grow. It’s between me and God
  • Is honest and straightforward, but doesn’t freak me out
  • Takes it slow, but is clear. I want to know what’s going on
  • Not a flirt. There’s nothing more unattractive than a flirt.
  • Has the guts/courage to ask you out if he genuinely wants to get to know you

My definition of a date –

  • The guys says actually calls it a date
  • It’s something you both actually enjoy doing, and is a good and smart environment

The purpose of dating (in my opinion) –

  • Getting to know each other
  • Being able to talk
  • Enjoying one another’s company (in a good way)
  • Casual, but with intent