Every time you and I get hurt, there is a lie that the devil tries to ingrain in you.
Here are some of the lies in my life that the Holy Spirit has helped me pinpoint:
- You’re not beautiful.
- There is something wrong with you. That’s why they rejected you.
- You will never be loved.
- You don’t deserve love.
- You will never have a husband, or a home, or children.
- You will not be able to have children. Be afraid of that.
- Being married is going to be scary. Being with your husband is going to be frightening.
- You’re going to be a bad mom.
- You are mentally ill.
- You are a terrible, hurtful person.
- A new boyfriend will try to, or demand and manipulate you, to “touch” you.
- You’re going to lose your job and not be able to support yourself.
- You are a failure and will always fail.
- You will never have a loving relationship with your family again.
- You will be abandoned and rejected always.
I was under very serious spiritual attack today. Tons of voices in my head. Panic in my heart. It was terrible, and I fled to a gal friend’s house, and spent the rest of the day with her and her family. I cried so hard, over and over and over, and whispered of the broken things in my life. And she was there for me. Even better, she understood the spiritual warfare, and gave me the tools I needed–straight out of God’s Word.
I loved going down through the woods with her and her passel of children, and down to the crik. The autumnal woods were like a breath of mountain air. The children laughed with me, and refreshed my spirit. And I cried so hard, and my voice was so broken, and she listened and helped me. I never fear exposing my tortured, mangled heart to her. I trust her utterly. I know God sent her to me.
And just to not feel like a burden. Her house was a mess, and I honestly loved that. Her children were so sweet, and that helped so much. Their orphaned squirrel was amazing, and so adorable and funny (his name is “Ginger”). My friend is like an animal charmer. She reminds me so much of myself, and I trust her even more because of it. Her children don’t mind that I’m crying in their living room. Her husband doesn’t mind. Her dad is there too, and he prays over me, and his spiritual protection is what I needed.
There are next to no places anymore that feel like that. When I needed it so desperately, God showed up. He promised to provide for me. And I believe Him and trust Him. My God is good. Though I often don’t understand His ways, I know He is good.