“The Truth Project” had a huge impact in my life. We did the series with our homegroup (all the girlz, and my scout brother family) the years before I left for the hellish environment of university. It gave me one of the foundations I desperately needed to keep my faith off at college, and to lovingly combat with the professors and show the truth. And, I believe, it even ended up saving the life of one of my classmates.
Years later, after my second boyfriend had broken up with me (he had a past in porn), I was watching it again. And Dr. Del Tackett mentioned that if we knew who God really was, then men would not look at porn. That intrigued me. So, I Facebook messaged Dr. Del Tackett, telling him my writing goal, and asking for his input.
Here is an extract from our conversations:
Dr. Del Tackett:
Hi, [Arielle]. I don’t really do Facebook, but happened to log on and saw your note. What questions do you have?
“You made some statements about pornography in the first or so lesson (I’m paraphrasing, but you said you’d talked with some men who struggled with it, and if they believed God was always watching them, they’d not be living that lifestyle). I’ve heard similar testimonies and have been blogging about the topic, for the purpose of offering wisdom and hope to those struggling, since it is such a great evil. How do you address it with people? (If you don’t mind).
“Thanks! I’m sure you’re super busy, and I appreciate you taking the time.
“Have a blessed Christmas!”
A later reply of mine:
“I feel like God brings me into various people’s lives for a reason. And He’s gifted me as a writer, so I’m trying to address this topic of pornography. I hate what pornography has done to people, and how the church sometimes addresses it, and I want to write about God so that they can see His heart for them and find freedom, if they want to get free.”
One of his most powerful quotes:
“It is important to note that when God created man, He made them male and female, so sexual issues go to one of the most basic designs of mankind.
“Pathologies here can become so deep that they require professional help. By that I primarily mean those kinds of programs that are required by those trapped in any addiction, possibly month-long programs. Alcohol addiction requires not only that but a life-time commitment. Sexual addiction, I believe is even deeper.
“I applaud your desire to help in this area. It is one of the toughest to deal with, but we live in a culture that is awash with sensuality. Because of how we are made, this is especially devastating to the male, but it is increasingly effecting the female.
“All of it is the enemy’s attack on the image of God, which he hates, that has been forged into the essence of man. I am, by no means, an expert in this area. You may wish to seek advice from those who are. Dr. Juli Slattely is one.
“May the Lord bless you in your efforts. Soli Deo Gloria! Del”
After I dated the second time, I asked God that the next guy He sent would not have a past in pornography. God answered “no” to that request of mine. But He’s giving me a bird’s eye view, and I feel I can see (a part) of His plan. And man alive, am I blessed to be a part of this plan. “Be strong and courageous,” is one of my favorite verses.
My goal is to destroy pornography at its roots, and to help set free the church (by God’s might, not mine. Because I am constantly running out of strength, and having to constantly turn to His). And I know, because I’ve seen this happen over and over, that as soon as this ministry becomes about me, it will fail. May that never happen, by God’s grace.
Here is some advice. I am but a child, as many keep telling me. I am young, yes. But that doesn’t mean that God cannot use me mightily.
Women: Seek God. Honor Him. Choose to act as Jesus would act. But listen for His Voice, because He will not tell you all the same thing He told me. My first boyfriend was living in evil, and to continue to date him would have been, I believe an abomination. Each story is different. Walk in whatever path God calls you to.
Men: You are heroes. You can beat this, with God’s strength. You can “lick it,” as us country folk say. Dig deeply into God. See yourself through His eyes. If you do, you’ll already have beat the devil at his own game. For the devil’s goal is to destroy you. Lift up your head, and see God’s love, and what He did on the cross.
Men: Here is another point that Dr. Del Tackett made in his communications with me. I think you will find it powerful.
“Another key thing to study is the design for marriage and the desire God has placed within the man towards his wife and his desire to please her. He cannot do this through pornography and will therefore always be left unfulfilled, though the lie takes him back there over and over again.”
Don’t let porn into your life. And if you do, repent, and know God’s forgiveness. Don’t let it be the “secret sin.” I don’t care how ashamed you are of it–have the courage to seek out godly help. You will meet many Christians who will condemn you, but God will bring you more that will love you as you need to be loved. He will provide you with the support system you need.
And if there’s a woman in your life, don’t put it on her shoulders. Porn gives us women horrific pain, and attacks our identity. We will need help and support as much as you yourself do. Don’t make your woman fight alone. Cut off, you both will die.